as i unwrap the foils of the egg of creme…i notice your gaze…it is watching my large man fingers fumble with the delicate, thinner than paper foils….your eyes are glistening and moist with desire for my creme egg…which i am about to make nude from it’s colourful wrappings….

….the foils fall to the earth…and i gently hold onto the chocolate egg…holding it ever so gently…with my right middle and index fingers…and my handsome pollex digit….i hold it in front of your lips….

i say, “are you….ready to take this into your mouth?”

you tell me that you are….

suddenly, you violently jerk forward and your mandible latches onto the egg…

creme spurts forth from the violent action ye hath taken against thine oval lobe….and dribbles from your lips….

….and dribbles down my fingers….

…down my wrist and mingles with the black arm hair of my arm that is very hairy  and becoming…

….i eat the other half.

Ain’t no thang but a chicken wang
We havin a smoke out in the Dungeon with the Mary Jane
It’s just a pimps(players), Mack daddies(East Point)
It’s all about that ses in yo chest(It’s the joint)

also, my dick.

i agree, lady bucks…. i agree….

i think i may create a conquest of having the world’s cereal companies include my handsome face on all cereal boxes…the most challenging would be the grape…nuts….

….but i am sure something can be figured out.

i forgive thee lady….as i tend to do…but thine heart always becomes broken and i often weep…alone…and it is a terrible sight to see….

just think of it this way….”Bryan with a “Y”, is mighty fine….Bryan with an “I”, makes Ferry cry….”

Outkast - “Roses”

ziggystarbucks:

Bryan Ferry sits down, his bowtie askew, sequined jacket dutifully hanging on its hook by the door.

With a flourish, Bryan swipes a box of Br(y)an Flakes from the cabinets and a carton of milk from the fridge. The milk has a “lost child” notice on the side but Bryan wiggles the carton around so he doesn’t have to stare at the suspiciously familiar photo of “B. Eno”.

Clutching his hand to his heart, head thrown back, balefully crooning to the beauteous plaster ceiling of his summer bungalow, Bryan tosses Br(y)an Flakes in the general direction of the bowl set on the table before him. Most of the cereal misses the bowl entirely, hitting the floor with a gritty crunch. Balls.

Not one to be stopped so easily, Bryan puts down the box of cereal and snatches the milk carton instead. In a very out-of-character move, he eschews the cereal and simply chugs the milk straight from the container. It’s not exactly fresh milk and Bryan sputters a lil. He wipes away his milk mustache with the bowtie resting under his chin.

Prairie roooOOOOooose…. Bryan washes down the cereal-and-milk,-minus-the-cereal with a cup of coffee. Bryan’d forgotten to brew the coffee so in reality it was a cup of coffee creamer with sugar in it. 

Bryan glanced at the clock beside the door. It was nearly midnight.

Gracious me, Bryan sang in a low dramatic voice, that’s enough breakfast rehearsal for one night.

Tomorrow, I’ll do it for real!

And with that, Bryan pirouetted out of the room. 

——

I often eat breakfast cereals such as this….minus the lady-parts….

ziggystarbucks:

nosmokingpistol replied to your post: Bryan Ferry is dramatic about everything I bet he…

foami replied to your post: Bryan Ferry is dramatic about everything I bet he…

PLASTIC? not in the house of ferry. he eats from albino tortoise shells washed up on the shore of his tropical beachfront mansion.

it’s Bryan……..

…

with a “Y”…

…..the gold coins…within my chest….of treasure….vibrate…in such a way………

serpentinesleekness reblogged this from you and added:

oh, Bryan you are so mean.